not happy is a step in the right direction. Got pretty good at sitting around miserable, bemoaning all that was wrong, I didn't have, etc. Yep, I was the ol' pity-party gal. Not much fun there.
Then I re-learned that happiness doesn't happen to you; it's not applied from the outside. Gotta do that yourself. SO in an effort to amend my reality I tried seeing what was at least OK about my world.
Had to find my sense of humor again; misplaced and dusty though it was, it was still functioning. Reclaimed it and put it back in service; gee, life is better when you can see some things are funny.
Remembered (maybe rediscovered?) I have friends interested in me. That has always amazed me; but thankfully it seems to be true. Connecting with other people sure helps. You know that drill--not alone, other people have problems too, you can learn from other's experiences, . . . .
IF misery loves company, it may be because the burden doesn't seem as heavy; whether you're crying or laughing together it certainly helps.
Been down few different roads in my time, and not all destinations viable. BUT that may have been part of figuring me out. I've gone from a silly, pollyannish and not very wise girl to a grittier, more experienced if not wiser, gal (I choose to wait few years for 'old woman').
Believed for a while that a positive mental attitude (PMA) could fix everything; so now I think it won't fix everything but it at least helps.
What's the point? Not sure what I could do next, not entertaining grandiose dreams, but something interesting could develop and I hope I'm paying attention.
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